My feelers are fixed, but my words are not.

All my life I never felt enough, I was emotionally anemic. My little sister once told me: "I think your feelers are broken."


And yet God (at sundry times and in divers manners) has been breaking me up inside and giving me emotions. At times I feel like Pinocchio ("I'm a real boy!"), trying out my human-ness as a new thing. I don't have a lot of experience at coping with so much feeeeeeeeling. So sometimes I'm in the back of a library, whispering out my wounds and worries to a friend and I can't make my words come right or my face look right or my heart feel right, even though everything is whirring around perfect and punctual in my head.