How to Eat a 10¢ Blueberry

okay, THESE berries I picked with my own two hands (pictured)

You do not chomp these berries. You do not inhale them or devour them. You do not hurry these berries.

We misread the sign at the grocery store. Organic Blueberries 97¢. A half-pint of pesticide-free, God's-best-work blueberries for ninety-seven cents? Sounds too good to believe. But we believed. We believed it four times over. 

The receipt on our dining table showed us that each little container of unconventional berries cost $5.97. Five dollars and ninety-seven cents.

This one quart of blueberries cost us $24.

So you do not hurry these berries. You set the berry before you. You carefully, thoughtfully bathe the berry in clean water. You greet the berry and dry it gently, like you would like to be toweled off when you are old and weak: with dignity.

You transport the berry to your lips. You invite it inside, and if it obliges you, you thank it. You say, "No, thank you," and you welcome it to your tongue.

If you must do more than wait for it to dissolve of its own will, going gently into that good night, you press the berry between your muscly tongue and the smooth roof of your mouth––don't waste any on the untasting teeth!––and massage the flesh, the skin, the juice of the berry.

When the organic blueberry is pleased, when the berry acquiesces, when the berry bursts, you make the berry totally your own and you swallow it and you remember your ten cents as a purple dream down the throat.

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Let Them Eat Kale!

Kale

is the superstar of healthy food right now. Everything that is even a little bit good for you seems to be in kale: it's high in iron and calcium, fiber and antioxidants, omega fatty acids and hip factor. What's not to like?

For some people the answer to that question is, "The mystery. . . . and maybe the flavor a little bit too." There are those that find kale a little bitter, so they shy away from it. Most people, though, avoid kale at the grocery store mostly because they don't know what to do with it. "

So, I just munch it off the stem as I watch tv? Or what?" 

When I was a kid, I told my babysitter that I was allergic to spinach. That was a lie mostly, except for the fact that cooked spinach really does make me gag. If I make it go down my throat, it doesn't stay long. As with spinach, so with all greens. Therefore, while I like the self-righteous feeling of eating a lot of healthy greens, I'm also kinda picky about how I eat them.

So maybe if you're looking for a place to start with the wonder food we call kale, you'll also like these, my favorite kale recipes. Click on the pictures for links to the recipes.

This is a mildly flavored powerhouse of nutrition right here. No cooking required, either: just assembling! (My favorite kind of "cooking!")

I recommend toasting almonds for this recipe (just toss raw almonds on a hot, dry skillet for a few minutes) and if you can take it, don't skip the red pepper.

Works well with variations, as well, such as parmesan or cayenne. And even people who say they don't like this vegetable

love

kale chips. Try 'em!

  • I couldn't find a recipe for my personal favorite >>

A bunch of kale torn into bite-sized pieces

An avocado or two, diced

A few big tomatoes, diced

A couple tablespoons of olive oil

A tablespoon or so of lemon juice

a teaspoon each of salt and cayenne

Then massage and mush all the ingredients together until the kale softens a bit.